Every Step Is Home

Just returned from CNY vacation in my hometown. Realized that nowadays I often have to rethink the context before using the term "hometown" -- should I say "birth town" instead? While I was here I'd say "go back to Indonesia" but while I was there I'd say "go back to Singapore". =X

Recalled that at my citizenship ceremony, Dr. Vivian Balakrishnan said something along the line of belonging to the nation without denying our ancestry or forgetting where we came from, all of which shaped who we are. That point of view really impressed me at that time and had dispersed the conflicted feeling I used to have about my nationality.

A recent article that addresses the topic of the Singaporean identity in connection to the White Paper on Population also resonates with the above point of view:
6.9 million people and an emotional hump

Not sure whether that link will be permanent, so I hope it won't violate any copyright to quote the relevant parts here:

Singaporean is by definition a nationality, not an ethnicity nor a race.

It makes some sense for the Japanese to fear immigration as they want to preserve their ethnic homogeneity. Recently, when Hong Kong’s leaders made similar remarks that Hong Kong’s ethnic homogeneity of Cantonese people will be threatened by more Mainland Chinese immigration, it made sense too, even if one argues they are all ethnic Chinese.

But Singaporean? What is that?

It is neither race nor ethnicity, neither a language group nor even a religious community. Singapore is Singapore precisely because of its diversity, not because of homogeneity.

We seem to have forgotten the Singapore Story. It is a story of an island of immigrants forged from many races, many religions, many cultures. It is a story of a nation that welcomed different people who wanted to make a better life to find a new home. It is a story of a country whose descendants of these original people still celebrate various festivals, where Mosque meets Temple, where Christians live alongside Hindus, and even if most of us speak English or Singlish, we still preserve our ‘native’ tongues.

[...]

In the end, like others, I feel nobody defined it more eloquently than one of our founding fathers and the author of the Singapore Pledge, S. Rajaratnam.

He said, "Being a Singaporean is not a matter of ancestry. It is conviction and choice."

Memento

Let this be a reminder of our common ground,
of how everything is right
even when everything may change;

Let this be a reminder should everything change,
if ever I lose sight of all you give
in the face of what I crave;

Let this be a reminder that above what struggle may come,
with heart and mind, feel and reason
I do love you.

Little Happiness

me and my bits of happiness
a sound,
a sight.

we and our bits of happiness
a touch,
a smile.

Before We Can See the Sky

I really should have stalked her better. Not only so that I wouldn't discover these beautiful things so late, but also so that I can perhaps start saying what I've been hearing people say about k.d. lang: "This woman can do no wrong." =D


Katie Melua - Blowing in the Wind (Bob Dylan cover, live)




There have been many renditions of this song but the only one I've heard before this is Peter, Paul and Mary's acoustic version (at the time when I haven't known what the lyrics meant yet). While I like this one for its own style, the comparison just added on to my marvel at the dynamics in Katie's rendition.

On the topic of seeing the sky... 
Welcome back, my beloved clouds, colours of sunset, glimpses of stars.
心配していた--
また会えて良かった。

Uranoleon

Through clouds rich the strips of orange sun flares,
as yesterday it has been a full sphere burning cumulus black,
through day passing that has seen it golden upon bluest blue,
to the pale and the fierce of depths across shades of vermilion.

Sky, adored sky,
like life,
beautiful because you're looking like that,
fascinating because you're never the same.

The Land of Shadow

So all's to be rain clouds today,
gray upon gray upon gray?
Won't you let me see again
    cliffs red, ocean yellow,
    desert crowned silver halo,
that enchanting trophosperic land?

Days of Leisure

Back from a two-day cruise trip. =) Star Cruises to Malacca/KL, with sis and bro-in-law. As what would usually be called a 'getaway', but I went more for the experience rather than the need for escape, since I think I enjoy my routine life all right, ahaha.

So, obligatory trip photos and accompanying rambling...


Well, first of all, our cabin door, though this photo was taken just before checking out. =D I like the green color of it (hence the photo; not for any 4D adventures), but it's not coming out right in this photo because of the lighting right above it. =|

Didn't spend much waking hours in there of course, but since the TV had a Japanese channel, NHK, I tuned in for a while to see if I see anyone I know. =)P


We tried to catch the sunrise on the first day, but the clouds were so thick we didn't really see much. Still, I think the clumpy pinkish clouds were 'cute', and the sky-horizon-sea view was one of the best highlights of the trip to me.


We missed the timing on the second day, but at least still not too late to see this beautiful view:


So delighted was I, that I asked to be photographed with it (the only one with my face you're going to see on this page lol)...


...and proceeded to take the pictures of the sun rays falling on various objects...



That last one also showed the jacuzzi, which we specifically planned for using. =D Sounds a bit kampung (sepok) huh. LOL.


Water slide, and yes, I did get on it. =D; Was of course "don't want, scary, can't swim" on the first day when my bro-in-law braced the long queue for it twice, but the next day he managed to convince all of us that it was definitely safe. Well, since we were already in our swim wear after the jacuzzi, after ascertaining the harmlessness of the water trap at the end of the ride, we finally went.


Luckily we listened to him, because it was wonderful to be sliding through the view of open sky at those parts. =D; Well, this morning I found out there was also a water slide beside the Jurong West Sport and Recreation Centre, which should be more accessible than the cruise. =)


More things by the pool side. These made me think of R2-D2 so they got a camera share. =D


Also thought that looked scientific, even if the reflection on the glass cover was a bit distracting. You could see my camera-holding hands reflected on it too, ahaha.


If you've seen my excessive photographing of the sky before, hopefully this won't seem too random. I thought the wave patterns were pretty...


...and pretty thought-provoking, too. Seeing the white bubbles race forward and then disappear, it was like a reminder of: 'Life is transient, so how far can you go before it ends?'

The land of destination was Malaysia, where we only spent 3 hours. Shopping, of course. >:D No pictures from the mall since we were pretty much in a rush, lol.


So, how different was Malaysian sky? Maybe not much difference, but it felt 'gentler' to me somehow. As in, the blue is of a lighter shade, so less contrast with the clouds' white.


Nearing dusk, adorned with the sudden gush of birds...


The best highlight of the trip was unfortunately something I couldn't take a picture of. At night, out at sea, the sky was a darker dark, and the stars seemed so near. Felt like I was face to face with Orion (which gave me the urge to sing that Nakashima Mika song to it everytime, lol), and I wished I had studied more of the constellation map to recognize those around it. Three-quarters of that dream fulfilled now...? (Yeah, I'm easy.)

At one time I was standing at the darker side of the ship, facing the part of the sky that had no visible stars. Before that I had thought it would be nice to have an undisturbed view of the sky, but at that time it actually felt a little scary to be looking at the pitch black without any 'grounding' object at the corner of my eyes.

Anyway... since my camera couldn't capture those, I took photos of the night lights and their gorgeous reflection on water instead...


On our last night onboard, they held a 'farewell party' with chocolate buffet (if only we had more stomach space after all the buffet dining throughout the day!) and a cool band performance. They captured my attention with an impressive Christmas medley a cappela, and performed some swing-y songs I didn't recognize but happily swayed along to anyway.


Remember the R2-D2 from before? Those turned out to be light projectors for this stage. =D


This photo was taken from a weird angle as I was actually starting to leave already, thinking it was getting late. But halfway to the cabin they stayed my feet with the catchy 'Summer of 69', followed by other rock classics, and even slipped in that famous 'Nobody'. xD


The trail we blaze left as we were nearing Singapore.


And a last picture of the sky, just because. >:D

More photos on the Facebook album here. In the past I'd make a page on my website for easier organization, but I won't have access to it for much longer, so I'm withdrawing little by little. =P

Glorious

So this is what it feels like;
This is how it feels when you're finally walking on the inside.
This is what it looks like;
This is how it looks from the outside staring in.

"Are you in love lately?" she asked,
which I thought was strange, back then,
but she might have read it right after all, because

the sky throughout November
has been the prettiest I've seen of her,

these dreams I'm now courting
might have been flirting with me all along, unnoticed,

and a long-time adoration I thought was flawed
is turning out capable of stirring in me, emotions
as profound as gratitude.

So who cares if the attraction is superficial,

when I finally get a glimpse of the world inside
and with such clarity,

when I'll take without hesitation, a choice inferior, yet
unfailingly beloved;

this freedom it has dared me to take
if maybe too shallow to call happiness,

is still pretty close to

light.

Spectrum

Something Resh said in yesterday's talk that really stayed with me: (paraphrased)

No teaching can lay a monopoly on Truth. The path is individual. When you use the knowledge on your own experience, scars and pain, the path becomes your own.

A somewhat relevant thought that has been in my mind lately runs in a different direction...

There are a lot of personality categorizations: extrovert/introvert, optimists/pessimists/realists, and so on. People usually do not fit exactly into one end. What's more, the in-between states manifest in not only many degrees but also many flavours.

There are the outgoing people who lead conversations and keep the group spirit high; there are the reserved people who listen silently and speak only when necessary; and then there are the geeks, who generally keep to their thoughts but come alive on specific topics. =)P

(Side note: I am very much hooked on The Big Bang Theory recently and am recommending it to any friend with the slightest geek inclination or even without.)

I was thinking that it probably resembled the colour palette produced by varying the RGB component balance-- just much, much more complex, considering the number of distinct trait-controlling genes in our DNA sequence... add to it the accumulation of different experiences, environments... I think it is closer to irregular by then.


There is also the sunrise/sunset test: people who prefer sunrise are said to be optimists while people who prefer sunset are said to be pessimists. I don't really stand by this theory if I think of the nocturnal people who begin their day on sunsets... And visually speaking, I think both are equally beautiful, and that probably makes me neither an optimist nor a pessimist, but a romantic. xD

Speaking of romantics, we also come in many flavours... Reflecting on a conversation on meteor showers the other day, I think that much as I'd love looking at starry skies, I don't get as excited as when I look at a sky full of colours or clouds. (I see that everyday and I still think it is breathtaking every time!) Though, now I suddenly yearn to go inside a planetarium to experience the 'wow' feeling before I can make that claim confidently... Science Centre, anyone? =D

Edit: After deeper probing, it seems that the SSC's Omni-Theatre/Planetarium is for IMAX movies (nothing star-related on the current list), while their portable planetarium system is by rental arrangements, and the Observatory stargazing is via telescopes. Hmmmm.

He gets his temper from his daddy.
He's got my eyes.
All that science stuff, that comes from Jesus.
-- Mary Cooper, "The Big Bang Theory: The Luminous Fish Effect"

Which Side Are You On?

The sky this morning.

(sorely tempted to make corny references to 'the Dark Side of the Force')

The proportion of clouds compared to 'sky' also reminds me of this quote:

"How inappropriate to call this planet Earth when it is quite clearly Ocean."
-- Arthur C. Clarke

back to the days of Christopher Robin...

エレベーターで 鏡に自分を見る時

ビルを出て 夜空に小望月を見る時

『 Return to Pooh Corner 』 の歌詞
♩ back to the days of Christopher Robin... ♩ が耳にする時

私達が 何故生きてるの? と思った。



なんとなく ちょっと暗いね (笑)

いや、 問い掛けらないかなあ～

答えを 一生追求し続けるはずだからね。

ビガク

不完全だけど

君への愛が

この空にも ある。

Beholder

A longer walk today made me look up, as it often does, and think, as I always do, "You never betray me, do you?"

Because the blue and white and uncountable touches of unnamed shades I haven't yet found a disagreeable day of.

But what is it that I was calling loyalty -- isn't that just her unintended countenance that my eyes find an unfailing beauty?

Then what is it that I would think a betrayal -- is it my indifference when light disappears at the fall of night?

From Dusk Till Dawn: The Pointless Picture

Woke up from my nap to interesting colors:


Coincidentally from that angle the window frame nicely parted the yellow-lit building and the soon-not-blue-anymore sky. The left picture was taken with no flash, the right one with night scene adjustment plus flash (the sky had darkened considerably by then because it took me like ten tries to get a decent one =P). No enhancement 'cos I'm lazy to work with softwares heavier than MS Paint on this computer..

The below are sunrise shots from a few months ago, just unearthed when I was transferring the above pictures to the same folder. Those silhouettes are of the temple roof just in front of where I live.


The title of this entry would probably be different if I had remembered to take photographs of the rain from that same window a few days ago, with the same building yellowish from the street lamps and the sky a colorless white. (A tune just sprung to mind so that was what I was occupied with..) The rain continued until the sky turned black -- another "colorless" instance -- so I thought that was interesting.

Uh, weird rambling? =P

Not Quite Home

Back from the trip. =) Not in the mood to write yet (and it seems like this will continue for quite a while =P) so just a few of my favourite photos here for now.

The blue sky of Seattle.

The "aquarium" at the MS Museum.

"I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."

That's us. =)

The central library at University of Washington.

1905 UW entrance exam.

And the sunset on the way home (but not quite home for me yet).

Twenty Days

Well, I'm back. =) Since Wednesday night -- physically. Not quite completely 'back' in the last few days, so this post might not be so late after all. ;P

Soon after I arrived I talked to Yesie, and I found that I had to watch what I spouted out to make sure they were in comprehensible Indonesian. =P Too used to speaking Teochew back home and watching Chinese TV channels that my dad likes. Different paradigm? Hee.

I'm over the language disorientation by now, but still readjusting to the different lifestyle. Back home I was very much domesticated. =P Singapore time runs much much faster by the amount of things to do, for work or for play. Strangely enough, my obsession with those I (used to) do for play is, at this moment, drastically down. I'd have expected them to amplify after leaving them for so long! As you see it's only now that I write this blog (and you'd probably notice the bad writing). Even more stunning is how slowly I'm updating my manga collection after the void, heh.

Anyway, about the trip. I've repeated travel stories to several friends, so I've lost steam to talk more here, but here are some pictures. =)

I've always wanted to take this kind of photos, since I'm rather obsessed with the sky (you've probably figured from the title of my blog). I had a former misconception that using cameras is forbidden inside airplanes (did they say electronics?) so I hadn't dared to. But I figured cameras wouldn't interfere with any navigation signal... right? (Well, we did survive that one flight.)

A look down at the clouds!

And a once-a-year view. =)

Chinese New Year Eve in Pontianak was filled with noisy fireworks that lasted well over three hours -- I went to sleep amidst the noises after I've watched enough. I know Singapore also has lah, but different atmosphere woh. =D Our town is small enough for most residents to see them in close distance.

This year our small town had more than the usual 'small fries' (those 'annoyingly loud but nothing to see' ones), since somebody sponsored for the big beautiful types. I've found out long ago that naked eyes (er, with specs when needed) have got the best lens focus capability, so it's probably for the better that I missed recording some of the nicest ones with my camera, as it means I was enjoying 'the real thing'. =)

The above four I snapped quite randomly. Of course there were more shots that caught nothing and went to trash. =D

That one looked like a lightning, and sounded like a thunder, too. I used video mode to record, and this is a screen capture from the resulting video; otherwise my timing couldn't be this good. =D The video has my surprised squeak also, so I'm not posting it, huhuh.

Anyway, the rest of the firework photos that follow are all screen captures. The video resolution is much lower so these are quite crappy. Interesting shapes they did with the smokes in the sky; but no doubt solidifying on our roofs afterwards, and we couldn't use the water from the first few rainfalls in the following days.

I call this "the spider that painted the sky blue".

For some reason the long-ish shape reminded me of the Lance of Longinus from Evangelion. Hee.

Several days into the New Year, the 舞狮 (lion dance) troupe finally roamed the streets of our town. Kids had been parading their own small lions just for fun before this came, but of course people only invited the 'proper' group into their houses.

Still I heard from my parents that even this trained group was not following the proper procedure by already parading on the 7th day (if I remember the date correctly). As they told me, before being paraded, the lion's eyes have to be opened in a proper ceremony, exactly on the 13th day of the New Year. This is the only day that the god responsible for this matter (for lack of better phrasing..) is present in the temple. Interesting huh.

The rest here are 'iseng' (just for fun) photographs.

As I told you before, I'm a sucker for sky and clouds. It just seemed bluer than normal Singapore sky, but to be fair I didn't watch the sky often enough in Singapore.

Second on my fave scenery list, flowers and greeneries. This is one side of our little garden. The other side is the edible/herbal group, and looks rather like a mini jungle. =P

A little background story before the next pictures. There've always been owner-less cats around our neighborhood -- they would sunbathe on someone's yard and have kittens on somebody else's roof and sneak around my mom's cooking materials for food. Nevertheless we began leaving leftover food for them, so they would patrol our place from time to time and keep the mice away (animal exploitation!). I found them quite fun to watch too.

That day, a technician came to repair the phone line, and the cats were looking on with interest as he worked from atop the stairs.
But, just like us, short attention span ler.
So they started looking at each other pretty romantically (or not, since I thought they were related, but a~nyway) and enjoyed some quality time.
Then the third (party?) sibling came, and Right Patch went off for an attempted affair, or so it seemed. But cat drama was not at all like some of the horrendous sinetrons we have, and this was soon over with everyone simply going on their own ways. ^^

I'd have more to say on the topic of horrendous sinetrons and some other stuff, probably next entry.