An Eloquent Astrophysicist

The second law of thermodynamics holds, I think, the supreme position among the laws of nature.

If someone points out to you that your pet theory of the Universe is in disagreement with Maxwell's equations -- then so much the worse for Maxwell's equations.

If it is found to be contradicted by observation -- well, those experimentalists do bungle things up sometimes.

But if your theory is found to be against the second law of thermodynamics I can give you no hope; there is nothing to do but to collapse in deepest humiliation.

-- Arthur S. Eddington, in "The Nature of the Physical World" (1928)

Free to be Flawed

I certainly can't do everything well,
and it's not an excuse not to learn,
but you know, sometimes...
when I feel you too could have been kinder,
I just don't feel like taking the blame.

Hi Lo

Thesis defense was 10 July 2009 10 a.m. Seminar Room 10 (COM1-02-10).

Will join Commencement in July 2010.

One and zero, how appropriate, lol.

A memorial post, so forgetful me can amuse myself next year.

(If I remember to check back, that is.)

Wall

How to need without being needy?
How to love without the flying and falling?

Mada mada da ne...

Winter Much?

Insider

Because I programmed it, I know the bugs left unresolved.

Because I wrote it, I know the vague points left hanging.

Because I built it, I see all the stitches in disguise.

Because I am me, I see all the flaws in denial...

With a dissatisfaction such as this

With an inferiority such as this

Could it be alright, for the time being

To be a better person -- just on a whimsical basis?

Trying Too Hard

This time I chose a lighthearted article to translate -- there is still a message in it, but he told it in an almost tongue-in-cheek style.

Whole chapter.

---

"Inside of me, time had started to move slowly.

"The two dramas 'Kimi to Ita Mirai no Tame ni' and 'to Heart ~Koishite Shinitai' were filmed almost back to back, thus my days had gone on without any spare time. Now, I finally got a break.

"First off, Doumoto Tsuyoshi [1] went to the beauty salon. I had my hair cut, and turned monkey-like. Ukikikik [2]. My feel [3] changed, as did my hairstyle.

"After that, I headed to a certain outdoor cafe to have a light meal.

"I ordered two pizzas. The waitress looked a bit surprised (at that), but I couldn't help it. My stomach had deflated considerably...

"Carbonated juice to go with the pizza... was what I wanted, but that wouldn't do for today. Today's Tsuyoshi was different from usual. He had an adult feel. Stretching myself a little [4], I ordered an ice cafe au lait. I drank it while enjoying the twilight sun and wind.

"It was so blissful.

""What a nice feeling," (I thought.)

"While I was soaking in the comfort of my own world, there, there, the pizza had arrived. Stomach preparation, OK. Let's down it in one breath! ...was what I wanted, but that wouldn't do. Today's Tsuyoshi was supposed to be a different Tsuyoshi. I put the pizza into my mouth elegantly, stuffed my cheek elegantly. Flawless, even if I did say so myself.

"Then, at that moment, an incident occurred.

"I had ordered a healthy pizza with a salad of lettuce, purple cabbage and other fresh vegetables on top. A strong wind came suddenly, and the cabbage went flying. Ah, the troublesome cabbage was dancing in the air. This was a considerable miss in the plan. The plan was to finish off the pizza in a beautiful and elegant manner, but thanks to the strong wind, it had crumbled and smashed to pieces. Today I was supposed to be all adult-like -- a so-called contest with manhood [5] at stake -- but I had been defeated by the unexpected special guest that was the wind.

"It was extremely regretful.

"In boxing terms, that would be like "one-round KO defeat".

"Picking up the scattered cabbage, Loser Tsuyoshi ate up the pizza, munching and scrunching just as usual.

""(For) humans, forcing things [6] just doesn't work," (I thought.)

"While I was grumbling so, the clouds floating in the sky reflected into my eyes."

---

Notes:

[1] Referring to himself by name, also in other points of the article.

[2] Imitating the sound made by monkeys.

[3] 「気分」 : mood, feel (aura).

[4] Likely in the figurative sense, i.e. 'making extra effort to do it'.

[5] As opposed to 'boyhood'.

[6] 「無理」 : unreasonable, overdoing, forcing.

---

Taken from 「男を賭けた勝負」 ("Contest with Manhood at Stake"), 1999
In 「ぼくの靴音」 ("The Sound of My Footsteps")
By Doumoto Tsuyoshi

.lang

This frustration when resources fail,

This fatigue over ink on paper, dot on screen, bed-hour calling but "two paragraphs left to the end of the chapter",

This occasional doubt of "never gonna get half as good with this as I could hope to be with English",

This faint, faint confidence that in the exact same way, I just might,

This endearing despair of "It's tough enough without this guy inventing his own words!",

This blithe knowledge that soon as I get there, I would so do the same,

This back-breaking haul, rare in these days of comfort,

This road, assuring in its lack of end-in-sight,

This tower to climb,

This promise of pain,

This thrill of hit-and-miss,


I'm loving it. ❤