Sky Errata

I'd had that quotation* on my banner ("No sky is heavy if the heart is light. -- Winston Churchill") for almost as long as I've had this blog -- but only today it occurred to me to check the authenticity. Alas, the suspicion turned out right: it was mistaken. =X

From the time I first fell in love with that line until the last time I fiddled with its placement on my blog (a few days ago), I've continued being a collector of quotations, and have gradually learned (and thus suspected) that quotations are often paraphrased or wrongly attributed. In this case, it's both. The line originated not from Winston Churchill but from Rev. Charles Churchill, in a verse of his poem "The Prophecy of Famine: A Scots Pastoral":

Nothing but mirth can conquer fortune's spite;
No sky is heavy, if the heart be light:
Patience is sorrow's salve; what can't be cur'd,
So Donald right areeds, must be endur'd.

(Some doubts remain whether or not the comma should be there, as a Google Books result disagrees with the above punctuation. But given the "be", the line looks to me more natural with the comma.)

So now I've fixed the mistake, and posted this in hope that the next person needing to authenticate the quotation can have a more definite starting point than simply the comparative numbers of Google search results. =P


* Also, taking this opportunity, I've finally gone and cleared up** my occasional doubt about the usage of "quote" and "quotation", in both senses of "someone else's words" and "pricing estimate". The widespread use of "quote" as a noun has left me uncertain whether "quote" (n) means one and "quotation" (n) means the other. Well, (in case you want to know) I conclude that there is no such difference: for both meanings "quotation" is the correct noun, and "quote" is the informal noun (while the correct verb, of course).

** Also also, I went to check whether "cleared my doubt" was correct before finally putting down "cleared up my doubt". Obviously I'm now paranoid.

Every Step Is Home

Just returned from CNY vacation in my hometown. Realized that nowadays I often have to rethink the context before using the term "hometown" -- should I say "birth town" instead? While I was here I'd say "go back to Indonesia" but while I was there I'd say "go back to Singapore". =X

Recalled that at my citizenship ceremony, Dr. Vivian Balakrishnan said something along the line of belonging to the nation without denying our ancestry or forgetting where we came from, all of which shaped who we are. That point of view really impressed me at that time and had dispersed the conflicted feeling I used to have about my nationality.

A recent article that addresses the topic of the Singaporean identity in connection to the White Paper on Population also resonates with the above point of view:
6.9 million people and an emotional hump

Not sure whether that link will be permanent, so I hope it won't violate any copyright to quote the relevant parts here:

Singaporean is by definition a nationality, not an ethnicity nor a race.

It makes some sense for the Japanese to fear immigration as they want to preserve their ethnic homogeneity. Recently, when Hong Kong’s leaders made similar remarks that Hong Kong’s ethnic homogeneity of Cantonese people will be threatened by more Mainland Chinese immigration, it made sense too, even if one argues they are all ethnic Chinese.

But Singaporean? What is that?

It is neither race nor ethnicity, neither a language group nor even a religious community. Singapore is Singapore precisely because of its diversity, not because of homogeneity.

We seem to have forgotten the Singapore Story. It is a story of an island of immigrants forged from many races, many religions, many cultures. It is a story of a nation that welcomed different people who wanted to make a better life to find a new home. It is a story of a country whose descendants of these original people still celebrate various festivals, where Mosque meets Temple, where Christians live alongside Hindus, and even if most of us speak English or Singlish, we still preserve our ‘native’ tongues.

[...]

In the end, like others, I feel nobody defined it more eloquently than one of our founding fathers and the author of the Singapore Pledge, S. Rajaratnam.

He said, "Being a Singaporean is not a matter of ancestry. It is conviction and choice."

Eloquence Cometh in Many Forms

Just a few things that got me contemplating recently.


Megamind (2010) revisited

TITAN: "This town isn't big enough for two supervillains!"
MEGAMIND: "Oh, you're a villain all right, just not a super one."
TITAN: "Yeah? What's the difference?"
MEGAMIND: [makes a grand entrance] "Presentation!"

So, my dad and I were choosing something to pass the afternoon among my movie collection.
DAD: "What are these about?"
ME: [look over the list of Batman and Marvel movies] "Oh, mostly movies made from comic books."
[after we decided on Megamind]
DAD: "Is this from a comic, then?"
ME: "Eh, no, it's an original movie, but I'm guessing a comic has been made out of it."

DIsk and I have had a few discussions regarding story adaptations from and to books / comics / manga / anime / movies / etc., and the level of purism involved. We generally agree that each medium excels in a different aspect and should be exploited accordingly (presentation!), and that while introducing plot changes could sometimes ruin the adaptation, staying strictly true to the original material at the expense of readability / watchability may not be a good thing either. Well, I myself might still be a purist about certain works, in which case I just stick to the original form, no trouble. =P


Carl Sagan, "Cosmos" (the book)

[Dedication page]

"For Ann Druyan:

In the vastness of space and the immensity of time,
it is my joy to share
a planet and an epoch with Annie."

Ann Druyan is Sagan's co-author and wife. He'd always had a poetic disposition, I gather, but when you're Carl Sagan, you get to be romantic with astronomical* facts to back you up.

* Double meaning is not really intended but probably works just fine.


Neil Gaiman, "Smoke and Mirrors: Short Fictions and Illusions"

[Introduction -- note on "Chivalry"]

"I wrote it in a weekend, a gift from the gods, easy and sweet as anything. Suddenly I was a writer transformed: I laughed in the face of danger and spat on the shoes of writer's block. Then I sat and stared glumly at a blank screen for another week, because the gods have a sense of humour."

Gaiman's stories are a hit-and-miss with me, but his side-notes tend to capture me with his penchant for describing his plot-bunny conception and writing struggles that we all can empathize with ("...staring at a blank screen, occasionally writing a word... Then I'd exit without saving"). Which means he is one of those authors whose book introductions are worth going through; in fact he did hide a story --which happens to fall under my 'hit' category-- inside the introduction of this book.

十二色と 一色あたし

The limits of my language mean the limits of my world.
-- Ludwig Wittgenstein

And I lament the limits of my understanding of this language sometimes, there being someone who speaks so beautifully in it...

...but thankfully the eloquence is not only in words.

Reporting In

It's been a long time since the last blog. There's work, and then there're other things... The usual excuse, you know the drill, lol. I guess I just didn't have as many introspective moments as before, or as many mini-epiphanies I think worth sharing.

Something important to me actually happened recently: my first trip to Japan. =) The main purpose was to attend a work-related exhibition in Tokyo, but of course, I didn't miss the chance to go to a planetarium. Two 40-min shows back-to-back. =q I also briefly infiltrated Tokyo University, indulged myself along the Used-Books Street, got a cheap music CD from the famous Akihabara (and got tempted by a new Sony Ericsson / Cybershot model that might not even make it to Singapore), and took really pleasant strolls along the vast gardens / parks / shrines despite the spring season not yet arriving; among other adventures (and misadventures). Facebook photo albums will follow soon, maybe. (For those photos, I definitely still love my Elm.)



The second-last day of my trip coincided with the Sendai earthquake, which was also my first earthquake experience. It was rather frightening when the building shook violently, but having no prior scale to compare, at the moment I had no idea how severe it was and so didn't really panic. =X Everyone around were calm, even though they did say it was stronger than usual. So it was only later when I realized that public transport had all ceased operating, that I started to feel lost and worried about getting back to the hotel and contacting my family.

Long story short, I had a long long walk (and climb) back to my room that day, but still considered myself lucky when I saw the stranded people sleeping on the floor in the hotel lobby / McDonalds / any available indoor space on my way back, and even more so when I watched the round-the-clock TV news on the tsunami-hit areas. The aftershocks continued to worry everyone, but my flight back departed as scheduled, and here I am.

So yeah, I was happy to be there, and also happy to be back. Warm and humid tropical weather that's kind to the skin and a solid ground you can take for granted. Not traumatized, for sure; I definitely still want to visit Kyoto and Nara one day. =) And having a not-so-bad experience of the earthquake firsthand is good for heightening my empathy towards natural disaster victims. (To quote from Les Miserables, "A little drop of rain can hardly hurt me [...] and rain will make the flowers grow.")

Moving on... I'd say it was back to normal life, but there have been some new experiences at work (attending some intimidating meetings) and outside it (trying to impart my half-baked skills to a group of youths with my half-baked teaching competence; contributing to fundraising projects...) as well. There were also catching-up meet-ups which went pleasantly. I think I'm pretty much enjoying life as it is right now, the excitement and the placidity alike.

A reflection to close off: I dropped by Eka's blog where she wrote at one point:

"It's between choosing your heart and your head. The sceptical-in-love me really wondered if choosing your heart will always make you happier."

That reminded me of a review on Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice by Michael Cohen, who said of Elizabeth and Darcy's marriage as

"a marriage [...] that shows us not that prudent choices lead to happiness but that the prudent are happy choosing prudently."

(No full source, but it was quoted here.) I think that is very well put.

Green Beginnings

...which are not so green new anymore, but it's only now that I get the time AND motivation to write about them, so. =D


Roses Are Green


--A new cell phone last August, because I renewed my line subscription (and because I lost my old one around May and had been getting by with a borrowed phone). It's Sony Ericsson Elm, with a 5 MP camera (for all the photos I like to take on the move) and a "normal" keypad (I do not trust touch screens as yet). Loving the camera so far. =)

It's also a green (eco-friendly) model, so I get interesting reminders such as after setting the alarm: "works even when phone is off"; and after charging: "unplug the charger from the socket as well to save energy". =D But seems it's considered an old model in this country because I couldn't find a screen protector for it anywhere (I usually like my gadgets accessory-free, but this one gets dirty easily and more persistently than I can tolerate), until a helpful shopkeeper in City Plaza got me a similar model (G700, note to myself) that works satisfactorily.

And yes, as the image shows, it's pink (or as per the official description, "pearly rose"). ^_^ The customer service guys (seen more than one of them 'cos the process had involved other complications not elaborated here) sounded skeptic when they told me the alternative black was not in stock, but I actually do prefer this colour. (Metallic makes most colours okay!) It's prettier, no?


It's Black, It's Green, It's Not Blinking Red


--A new portable hard disk from COMEX 2010, because the last one, an 80GB Samsung (a case-it-yourself which was still common back then), went puff without warning a week before (good timing?). But seeing as it had lasted five years in my not-so-tender care, I had good opinions about it, so I decided to get the same brand. This time I got a 320GB G2 model, which is also a green product (thus cheaper than the slicker S2 series).

I don't get why the reviews have been keen on the G2's visual design, with the dots and novel colours... I happen to not think it's nice, so I chose the least-offending black (^^0), but otherwise it's been working great -- lightweight and quiet.

On the note of dead hard disks, I have recovered data from a few before, but this latest one was a tougher case as the hard disk couldn't be detected by the PC, knocking noises and blinking red light and all. So I tried the freezer trick. Still no luck after a 24-hour freezing, nor a 3-day freezing, after which I abandoned it in the fridge and went on to dig up old backups. =P Three weeks after, I thought I had to put a proper end to it, so I took it out and gave it a last revival attempt, which, to my pleasant surprise and absolute delight, worked!

I'm not trusting any more important data to it, but it was still working okay the second and third time I plugged it in, so maybe there's life in it yet. =)


The Colour of Magic (Is Probably Not Green)


By DIsk's recommendation I got to know the wonderful wit of Terry Pratchett, whom I first ignored because fantasy was not my usual genre (LotR and HP have been somewhat short-term interests =P). As it is, I think it's more his fresh sense of humour that baited me, though the fantasy setting certainly lends a unique quality to it.

The title of this subsection (minus the bracketed part) is the title of the first book in his Discworld series, which ironically I haven't read (but soon will!). I started from the second book, and have since acquired the National Library membership (which I'd been postponing to do) just so I could start on a quest to consume the entire series. Do try it! It took only one line (conveniently the first in the book) for me to decide I love this author, so I'm venturing to say you won't waste much time testing the waters. =P

(In a semi-fandom clash, the latest release names of the VideoLAN VLC media player (used in my work project) seem to hint that the developers are sharing this interest. =D)


Green with Evil, We're Not


This is a closure to my previous post on Werkz. I have received response from NUS as well as an apology token from the studio, possibly after a follow-up from the university. I haven't quite expected this level of response, and it made me feel a little bad for the "blow-up" of the issue, though I guess it should've been the whole point of making a feedback. =D; Myself may still avoid dealing with them in the future, but I hope this incident has somehow improved things in the big picture...


Green Green Grass (Among Other Things) of Home


"I always say home is where you hang your hat."
"Um, no," said Twoflower, always anxious to enlighten. "Where you hang your hat is a hatstand. A home is--"
-- Terry Pratchett, "The Light Fantastic"

And this is just a notice that in two days I'll be disappearing for a while (not that I haven't, judging by the interval between my recent posts) for a trip back home. =) Back here mid-October, when you'll hear from me if I have anything worth publicizing. ^^

advocatus diaboli

There are no perfect men in this world,
only perfect intentions.
-- Pen Densham

He, the voice within who asks for perfection,
is he a friend or a foe?
He who frowns at the world's defects,
-- pained by them, rages at them --
he who demands a wholesome self,
is he for better or for worse?

She, the voice within who asks for perfection,
is she a friend or a foe?
She who judges poor-mannered folks,
-- pained by them, looks down on them --
she who detests indulgence in flaws,
is she for better or for worse?

Desiderata

I was in a poetic mood today, and was googling for the original of a translated poem I recalled from a Sidney Sheldon novel when I came across this "advice" poem (reminiscent of Kipling's "If"), and was quite touched by it.

Haven't I always, always come back to this crossing every now and then...

---

Desiderata
Max Ehrmann, 1952


Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

Be Gentle With Hearts, You Cannot See Them

Maybe he deserves it,
Maybe she brings it upon herself,

Maybe it's trivial,
Maybe it's exaggerated,

But so long as it is felt,
Pain is pain.


Assume nothing of hearts;
You cannot see them.

Be respectful of hearts;
You cannot tell how weak, how strong.

Be gentle with hearts;
You may not know when they're breaking inside.

It is such a secret place, the land of tears.
-- Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, "The Little Prince"
As translated by Katherine Woods

Spectrum

Something Resh said in yesterday's talk that really stayed with me: (paraphrased)

No teaching can lay a monopoly on Truth. The path is individual. When you use the knowledge on your own experience, scars and pain, the path becomes your own.

A somewhat relevant thought that has been in my mind lately runs in a different direction...

There are a lot of personality categorizations: extrovert/introvert, optimists/pessimists/realists, and so on. People usually do not fit exactly into one end. What's more, the in-between states manifest in not only many degrees but also many flavours.

There are the outgoing people who lead conversations and keep the group spirit high; there are the reserved people who listen silently and speak only when necessary; and then there are the geeks, who generally keep to their thoughts but come alive on specific topics. =)P

(Side note: I am very much hooked on The Big Bang Theory recently and am recommending it to any friend with the slightest geek inclination or even without.)

I was thinking that it probably resembled the colour palette produced by varying the RGB component balance-- just much, much more complex, considering the number of distinct trait-controlling genes in our DNA sequence... add to it the accumulation of different experiences, environments... I think it is closer to irregular by then.


There is also the sunrise/sunset test: people who prefer sunrise are said to be optimists while people who prefer sunset are said to be pessimists. I don't really stand by this theory if I think of the nocturnal people who begin their day on sunsets... And visually speaking, I think both are equally beautiful, and that probably makes me neither an optimist nor a pessimist, but a romantic. xD

Speaking of romantics, we also come in many flavours... Reflecting on a conversation on meteor showers the other day, I think that much as I'd love looking at starry skies, I don't get as excited as when I look at a sky full of colours or clouds. (I see that everyday and I still think it is breathtaking every time!) Though, now I suddenly yearn to go inside a planetarium to experience the 'wow' feeling before I can make that claim confidently... Science Centre, anyone? =D

Edit: After deeper probing, it seems that the SSC's Omni-Theatre/Planetarium is for IMAX movies (nothing star-related on the current list), while their portable planetarium system is by rental arrangements, and the Observatory stargazing is via telescopes. Hmmmm.

He gets his temper from his daddy.
He's got my eyes.
All that science stuff, that comes from Jesus.
-- Mary Cooper, "The Big Bang Theory: The Luminous Fish Effect"

Which Side Are You On?

The sky this morning.

(sorely tempted to make corny references to 'the Dark Side of the Force')

The proportion of clouds compared to 'sky' also reminds me of this quote:

"How inappropriate to call this planet Earth when it is quite clearly Ocean."
-- Arthur C. Clarke

An Eloquent Astrophysicist

The second law of thermodynamics holds, I think, the supreme position among the laws of nature.

If someone points out to you that your pet theory of the Universe is in disagreement with Maxwell's equations -- then so much the worse for Maxwell's equations.

If it is found to be contradicted by observation -- well, those experimentalists do bungle things up sometimes.

But if your theory is found to be against the second law of thermodynamics I can give you no hope; there is nothing to do but to collapse in deepest humiliation.

-- Arthur S. Eddington, in "The Nature of the Physical World" (1928)

Of Friends: Past, Present, and Imaginary

I feel like writing, so this time you'll have to bear with the long rambling plain prose instead of the cryptic poems -- most of which probably only understood by Eka who knows the background story in my life, anyway. xD
>> [INSERT] Voltaire: "Anything too stupid to be said is sung." =3

Met my namesake today -- my high school schoolmate, used to be the president of the student union ('Ketua OSIS' =D). That was one of the qualifiers people distinguished us with back then. Ah, nostalgic. Surprisingly it didn't feel strange referring to her with my own name. ...Well, I do like my name. xD *narcissistic much?* (Mom and Dad, おつかれさまでした! =) *bows*)

She's visiting for the long weekend holiday, and I met up with her together with DIsk. Updates, updates, people's (and our own) marriage status/history, reliving of old nicknames.. We Indonesians are really quite creative (and fearless) in conjuring up outrageous nicknames huh.

Eka joined us for a while since I had a prior appointment with her, and I was glad that all of us had a lively talk despite my usual practice of keeping my different cliques separate from each other (Eka knew DIsk but not my schoolmate). I think the indifferent me should learn from her some of that interest and curiosity about other people's lives. ^^0

Eka and I then set off on a hunting journey for the camera she wanted. It occurred to me that we are quite some geeks, lol, though we fancy slightly different ranges of gadgets, probably. I don't know much about cameras and that plus my natural neutrality has triggered Hady's skepticism over my 'usefulness' in Eka's buying process. I wonder if the need for moral support is a feminine concept that most guys do not practice? xD Even then I think neither Eka nor I have much of this feminine trait in us; she only calls on my support when it's something very expensive and I mostly only ask for technical opinions. (I'm painfully slow in deciding on a purchase, but that's a different issue, right.)

My small reunion has also triggered the talk about our own schooling pasts, and Eka was amazed at how different our lives could have turned out if we had made different decisions regarding our entrance to NUS. I might have known her brother instead of her! Ahaha, I guess we had a very fruitful talk today. Like, on the possible reason that we click well with each other. In Japanese personality terms, I'd be an M and she (as well as certain others I'm close with) would be an S? =D (I do hope I'm not treading on dangerous sub-context here. xD)

In a way, interacting with these 'S' friends has made me work on my laid-back attitude towards issues that are important to them, made me improve personality flaws I wouldn't have bothered with otherwise. And despite the occasional discomfort, it is probably a subconscious appeal that makes the relationship interesting and pulls me further towards them. I could only hope befriending me has something of similar benefit to them, probably to train their tolerance and patience towards laid-back people like me? Ahahaha.
>> [INSERT] Christina Aguilera: "Makes me work a little bit harder... so thanks for making me a fighte~r!" =D

Eka blogged about her tendency towards the negative and I guess I'm kinda the positive polar there (hopefully)... though I'm still not influencing her much. ^^0 I aspire for positiveness, I admire positiveness, and I think I still can't stand people who are too negative, but it's curious that I did find someone close to that ideal but that never pulls me as strongly as other aspects in my less-positive proved-and-tried close friends.

In this aspect, I'm very much a my-pace person -- I do things at my own pace -- even though I think it might not work for everyone's situation. My life has been very, very fortunate. I have my down and distressed moments too, certainly, but they pass soon enough; I cross the bridge when it comes, things come to me in time. Reading Eka's blog about her worries, I do think there are worthwhile worries that we should worry and then do something about... just that these haven't been very difficult for me, with all the help I've been getting and all the 貴人 I've met, bless them. Well, in the same spirit as above, I hope knowing people with serious worries will keep me from getting complacent. =S

Now, some celebrity news, since I find myself caring about them. =))

Ayaka, whom I'm a half-fan of, is now married to Mizushima Hiro, an actor I only knew from Hanakimi drama. I thought she was too young for it, but apparently the boyfriend proposed because she'd been battling a disease she only revealed recently, and he wanted to better support her in the treatment as her husband. She's always impressed me as someone mature, and while I don't know much about the guy, this clarification surely convinced me that she has married a really good person. The sad news is that she'll have to put her career on hold to concentrate on the treatment, after this year. I'm certainly looking forward to the comeback of that talent! Winding Road is now all the more uplifting when I'm down with my own insignificant troubles.
>> [INSERT] ayaka x Kobukuro: "Up ahead on the winding road, the self I dreamed about on that day is waiting for me..."

Then... Good Friday was Tsuyoshi's 30th birthday. Lol, it makes me uneasy to be remembering the birthday of someone I don't even know in person, but he did make it a big affair by releasing a single plus an album and holding a special concert on that day. The album music in general isn't much to my taste, but the single has beautiful (if rather emo) lyrics and the whole sky theme he uses for them easily gets me sold. Oh, the inexplicable charms this man has over thousands of us. xD
>> [INSERT] Tsuyo-shi: "[I] can't say, can't heal, can't erase, [the fact that] I love you..."

Lastly, I've started to follow American Idol again. =D At first out of curiosity for this Adam person firefly has been speaking highly of, and to a certain extent, the need to keep up with the conversations of some close friends, ahahah. Well, I soon think highly of him, too. And of Matt, whose performance I can always appreciate, somehow, no matter what the judges think. I have to stream the show on campus though, since I don't have a TV, and when I graduate this month I'll have to tap on all my leeching skills to find it online, I guess. ^^0

Long weekend, long long post. Submitting my thesis next week and will be moving on to the next stage of my research life. Yosh~

Kiss the Sky Revisited

From Daily Literary Quote. For lack of a better adjective... cute? =)

To hell with reality!
I want to die in music, not in reason or in prose.
People don't deserve the restraint we show by not going into delirium in front of them.
To hell with them!
-- Louis-Ferdinand Celine (French author)

Past take on the topic

Quote of the Day

Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy.
-- Apollinaire (French poet)

Saw it on my iGoogle today. I remember having contradictory thoughts on happiness and the pursuit of it after seeing the movie of that name, but I don't remember if I actually discussed it with someone. I have vague memories of a blog post... hmmm.

While You Were Sleeping

Was checking out the new location map of SoC, then I saw the label "LT27" and was suddenly struck with an unexpected nostalgic feeling. =) Ah, I've been seeing that building for years, and now we will be quite a distance away.

(Though one could easily say, how big is NUS campus really, or for that matter, the whole Singapore town?)

I have surely forgotten that I once missed the CELC at the old Admin building, the old NIE park, or the old KR hall (I suppose it's part of RVR now?) just the same.

Thufir Hawat said, "Parting with friends is sadness. A place is a place."

I can tell you many things I miss about Singapore as a place: the fresh air, the manageable size (long live Street Directory) and even more as an environment (the lack of all those things one would be fined for doing)... but I guess the core of it all is a matter of familiarity.

And we humans can adapt very well. The air quality has not improved in Beijing, but my dissatisfaction about it certainly has.

I've been so comfortable with my life back then, with all its ups and downs, with my semi-static circle of friends, even with all that my personality lacks, with all the shortcomings that attack my conscience from time to time. I accepted the offer for this temporary posting in Beijing because, simply, the opportunity was there. Minutes from the so-minimally-prepared departure, I was thrown to the discomforting realization, "Oh no, I will have to make new friends soon?"

By now I know there'll be bits of the same bittersweet feeling towards these new friends when I leave this city, as what I felt when I left for it; as what I still feel once a year on that taxi trip to my hometown airport.

And yet, it might just be a subdued sentimental recollection one year from now.

Much as it may sound anti-romantic, feelings do pass... or change, and I think that is perfectly all right, 'cause I'd like to think that romance lies, in contrast, in all the effort we spend on the feeling while it lasts.

Now is that mushy or what? =D

Heart of Bronze

Looks like it's Singapore Poly Flag Day today. Came across several waves of them on my way to campus.

First wave was just standing there without approaching me. In semi-rush, I passed them by.

Second wave was standing in a group of 5 or 6 on either side of the overhead bridge, chatting to pass time -- looking in all appearances to be ganging up on people. XD Brought the nostalgic term "tukang kompas" ("extorter") to mind... except that these were of course decent girls and boys for a noble cause. This time too I didn't make time to reach for my wallet, and passed them by.

Third wave was just a few meters away from the second, by herself, looking enthusiastic and asking sweetly. Naturally, I stopped and put in some money. =3

This is definitely the wrong way to approach the subject of charity, so I'd like to disclaim first that this post is not meant to go in that direction.

I am of the type of people who do charity if it is convenient. While in a rush I most likely will not stop for flags; if the rush is not so bad, I will contribute if I feel like it. (In fact, most things I do whenever I feel like it, regardless of the rush factor. ;P)

And yes, I belong to the camp of thoughts that says humans do good because it makes them feel good. I volunteer for things I enjoy doing. After all, taking pride or joy in what we do, charity or not, can only be a good thing, isn't it? Purpose has to come from oneself to be a sustaining power.

Does it make us hypocrites then? I hope this quote won't be looked down upon if I tell you it's from a manga, =D but a volunteer doctor in Fullmetal Alchemist impressed me when he said he'd "rather be a hypocrite than not do good" and went on to treat people who'd rejected him because he belonged to the other side of the war.

But I digress. I guess the point of this entry is that, most people will judge a god by his vehicle, and that's just natural.

I used to frown upon those charity shows on TV, but come to think of it now, they did what it took to be effective. I am idealistic enough to believe in the existence of pure altruistic intentions, but I don't think there are enough of these to make an impact on its own without a strategical push in other aspects.

Not to criticize the passive flaggers, though; certainly not from me who do things as I feel like it and who've been out flagging a total of once. =P Charity shouldn't turn into a reward system, at any rate. But the fact remains that people will be more inclined to give to those who "earn it", hence the need to tailor charitable efforts accordingly.

My Mountain and That of Mohammed's

I very much liked the song "Lord Don't Move the Mountain" when I heard it on The Pursuit of Happyness: "Now Lord, don't move my mountain, but give me the strength to climb." (Couldn't find the song, so if anyone would share it with me, much appreciated!)

Anyway, as I was looking up that song, I landed on The Hockey Rodent who interestingly noted:
"You don't need to move the mountain. You don't need to move Mohammed. The mountain ain't going anywhere. And Mohammed will undoubtedly move himself. All you need to do is motivate Mohammed to move in the direction of the mountain."
Good management lesson.

As you might already know (I didn't at first, hence this explanation), it was referring to the proverb: "If the mountain won't come to Mohammed, Mohammed must go to the mountain." Meaning one should know when to adapt to the situation. (This proverb in turn originated from the equally meaningful story of Prophet Muhammad.)

Three lessons from three mountains.

Finally, just to do justice to my obsession with quotes, let me just note the other beautiful verses that said something similar on this topic:

Let me not pray to be sheltered from dangers,
but to be fearless in facing them.
Let me not beg for the stilling of my pain,
but for the heart to conquer it.
...
Grant me that I may not be a coward,
feeling your mercy in my success alone;
But let me find the grasp of your hand in my failure.
-- Rabindranath Tagore

I have thanked Thee a thousand times for my roses,
but never once for my thorn...
Teach me the glory of my cross;
teach me the value of my thorn.
Show me that I have climbed to Thee by the path of pain.
Show me that my tears have made my rainbow.
-- George Matheson

Being Right or Being Happy

Got this good reminder from Nale. I took liberty to do some minor editing (can't resist =P).


Being Right or Being Happy

Being right or being happy is the choice I face. A line from a popular song "Hurts So Good" comes to mind. That musical refrain grabs my attention as I wrestle with feelings of anger and hurt. Being right feels so good; at the same time it causes much pain.

I can list all the ways in which I have not been treated fairly and have that self-righteous feeling which is satisfying because I like being right. But the price to be paid is mental anguish and it isn't just a one-time price. Like a toothache it remains until something is done about it.

A lifetime of conditioning makes it difficult to see that in every situation, we have a choice of how we act and think. The choice: spend endless hours in anguish as we come up with reason after reason to back up how right we are, or let go of the anguish and see that each person does about as well as s/he can. The universal is that fear, anger, hurt are behind each annoying behavior of another person. Perhaps compassion is the answer.

by Judy Walden


“Look at the weaknesses of others with compassion, not accusation. It's not what they're not doing or should be doing that's the issue. The issue is your own chosen response to the situation and what you should be doing. If you start to think the problem is ‘out there’, stop yourself. That thought is the problem.”
-- Stephen Covey